Generic News for the Media Addicted.

4 06 2007

Today-the city where you live.

World News-  Several people died in a suicide bombing today somewhere in Iraq, causing Democrats to  call for U.S. withdrawal of troops from the region, and adding that they were against this whole thing from the get-go.  President Bush gives a cocky smile and says “Fat chance, suckers!” and rides into the sunset on a giant robot.

National news – Major Cola company unveils its new line of breathing air.  “What’s the difference between your air and the air we all breathe?” Someone asks.  “Our air is 99.9% pure and it cost $1.25 a bottle.” Cola spokesperson responds. Wisconsin continues to insist upon its own statehood despite a complete lack of enthusiasm by the other states to include it in other state-like activities.   President Bush, riding atop a giant robot,  tours hurricane ravage portions of southern US, In a speech in a particularly messed up town, says “Thats nothin’ compared to what this baby can do!” (motions to robot)

Regional news-  Traffic is terrible,  Gas prices are high,  Schools are training kids how to be whiny, invasive species of marmots are rezoning political districts for their own gains,  Local newscasters are full of themselves.  Oh, and theres going to be major road construction on the way you normally take to work.

Breaking news-  Mayor Kevin R. Marmot declares that your city be demolished and rebuilt underground.  (who voted for that guy anyway?)

Personal news-  Your job, family, house, car, dog, and even your hobbies (which you spend entirely too much time and money on) are all conspiring to grind you towards a complete nervous breakdown.  No worries, that’s why you have heath insurance.  (Ps. Your premium just went up.)


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2 responses

5 06 2007
Mary

GOLLLDANG YOU MARMOT!!!! THIS IS THE VERY LAST TIME YOU GET YOUR WAY. I”M COMING FOR YOU AND ALL YOUR BUDDIES. YEAH THAT IS RIGHT YOU BETTER HIDE.

Sincerely,

Brock
Beaver City Zoning Commission
President

6 06 2007
Sarah

check this out, I found it (of all places) on Fox News website.

http://www.games4work.com/games/swf/supercoolpic.swf

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