Deconstructing thought.

18 12 2007

Do you ever feel like no matter what you do, you are wasting the precious moments of your life?  What are you doing right now?  Reading a blog.  guh.  Look at you there.  All fat and lazy, in your comfortable chair.  Eating large spoonfuls of Dijon mustard.  Oh, I admit, you may have class and sophistication.  You fold your socks twice before diving into an empty swimming pool.  But what are you doing?  How are you working to benefit society.  Or are you just expecting society to come over and toast your bread on both sides.  You expect punctuation marks on every sentence. You expect me to post new and interesting things ever once in a while. Well good for you.  You have corn in your pants.  Nobody expects you to have both your thumbs.   Why, you’re neurologically damaged.   Get a pretzel.  It’s the only thing that keeps the water buffaloes behind the fence.   Who is the president of this district?  Did you think I would talk?  My hand puppets are both named West.  I don’t know how to tell light bulbs apart.   The bath is the only place where I feel safe.  Cheese deserves proper introductions.  Elements of the past are like candy, except without  the metaphor.  The tree frog is a natural survivor, if he was  a dentist, all our problems would be solved.

On a scale of 1 to Banana,  how do you feel?


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4 responses

19 12 2007
Katie

BANANA! yum….^_^

19 12 2007
Phil

Did you just use a Japanese emoticon? BANISH– uh. Wait. No. It’s too adorable! I cannot resist! AAAAAAGH!

19 12 2007
Eugene Thornbuckle

After reading that post I want my two minutes back. A: You mention thumbs, and I just broke mine. 2: Bananas are horrible and belong on fruit cakes. and D: Now i’m hungry.

22 12 2007
Phil

What do you need with thumbs anyway. They need to be opposable to be of any good…

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